"It’s not all you want to eat, it’s all you CAN eat! Hahaha!"

I seem to remember an SNL skit where people at an all you can eat restaurant got up to leave and the waiter restrained them, saying — no, it’s not all you want to eat — it’s all you can eat.  Cracks me up everytime I think of it.

Anyway, some of the ways companies try to get everything out of their employees can be just as creepy.  You think the free meals and dry cleaning are perks?  No, they’re sometimes just a way to make sure you don’t have any excuse for not working :-)

“What do you mean you need to go home for dinner?  We provide a full-service cafeteria and catering right here 24×7!”

Anyway, I promised a story on this…

A long time ago, I intereviewed with a small startup who wanted to make sure that everyone was highly intelligent and fully dedicated.  Every employee was issued a pager and was required to keep it on and with them 24×7 so that they could respond to their colleagues.  All personal errands were taken care of by a small staff — everything!  Dry cleaning, oil changes, visits by the plumber (the staff had keys to homes), food delivery.  They even would handle getting you an apartement and furnish it for you.  Needless to say, I found it a bit creepy.  But they definately wanted to harness the total creative output of their employees….

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